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The 40k Army Personality Test

6 Minute Read
Feb 5 2016
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librarianPimpcron plays Astrologist this week. Is he accurate? Or just crazy?

I have a secret theory that the army we choose to play may say something about our personality. The reason why we may be drawn to an army is because of something inside us that resonates with that army. As an undying robot, I’ve been an observer of humanity for a while. I’ve played hundreds of games against many different people. Over the course of the years I have noticed trends in different players who play armies. Obviously this won’t be 100% and some of you may not fall into these categories, but these are my observations. These are in no particular order. This is just silly and for fun, so don’t go changing careers or getting a divorce over any of this. Also, I ran up a huge bill on the Psychic Friends Hotline writing this paper.

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Tau: You trust your own judgement and do what you think is right. You are very firm in your beliefs and are hard-headed about them. You believe you know better than other people and may come off as condescending by accident, or maybe intentionally. You tend have an analytical mind are good with contingency plans.

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Chaos (Daemons & Marines): You like being unique and don’t mind not being “normal”. You like doing things your own way and don’t mind attracting attention to yourself by being different. You have an aggressive side and more than likely enjoy music that is darker and more “on the fringe” than most people. Your aggressiveness is a good quality because you are to-the-point and usually honest. Your aggressiveness is a bad quality because you are more likely to let your anger get the best of you.

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Orks: You love a good, crazy experience and can be a bit reckless at times. You probably have plenty of crazy memories from your past, as well as quite a few regrets. You don’t take things too seriously and do things for the fun of it; even if they are destructive. You are more likely to be an entertaining person, and enjoy spending time with people; maybe as the center of attention. The problem with your personality is that you often aren’t serious when you need to be and often do things before thinking.

99550101460_SpaceMarineLegionCenturionWebExclusive01Space Marines: You believe in the establishment and the decency of mankind for the most part. You are more likely to give people the benefit of a doubt, and are probably let down more than you’d care to admit. You are orderly and like structure in your life. You are willing to get the job done when you have to; even if it means some things that you don’t want to do if you believe the end result is worth it. On the other side, you are more likely to strive for your superiors’ acceptance and enjoy getting a pat on the back.

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Imperial Guard: You know that “there is more than one way to skin a cat”. You usually take a multi-faceted path trying to cover all of your bases and are good at making backup plans. When one plan fails, there is always another to pick up the slack. You are a “destroyer” when it comes to your goals and don’t accept half measures. If something needs to be done, you go at it from every angle you can think of, and hope to see a crater when the dust settles. On the negative side, you are harder on yourself than most people and you are your own worst critic.

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Eldar: You always use the right tool for the right job. This enables you to be fast on your feet due to being prepared and not bogged down by taking unnecessary steps to solve a problem. Some could call it cutting corners, but it’s really just more efficient. You tend to come off as a bit smug due to your confidence in your own abilities to get things done which rubs people the wrong way. You prefer the single, precise Death Blow to your problems versus other ways to solve them.

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Tyranids: You know that most of life’s problems are easier if you have a support network of friends or family that can help you. Your inner circle means a lot to you and you enjoy being around people. You may even be a bit manipulative of other people and secretly keep some people around because of what you might need them for in the future. Naturally, you’d never admit this though. Your personal network tends to be larger than the average joe. You are often the person who sees someone he knows wherever he goes (the store, gas station, school, etc.). On the down side, the people close to you who notice these traits may wonder where your true loyalties lie.

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Dark Eldar: You are a freedom lover and very tolerant of different views and lifestyles. You enjoy living for the sake of living and believe that you are master of your fate. This makes you vastly more flexible in problem-solving than your opponents, but doesn’t do anything to safeguard you from making a mistake. You tend to be a bit reckless and when you fail, you fail hard. You are a “Poisoner” and hold stealth and cunning high over brute strength and power.

NecronOverlordNecrons: You have the utmost faith I your own strength and feel like the rock for many people in your life. You may not be aggressive so much as you are just durable. Everyone knows they can rely on you for help when they need it, which might lead you to feel under-appreciated or used from time to time. No matter what happens in life, or how bad it looks, you’re the type of person who says to them self, “I can handle this.” The problem with type of person is, you will seldom find someone to lean on when you need help.

So what’s my margin of error? I want you to let me know if my descriptions were correct for you, and/or if you know anybody who I was right about?

Want to witness my slow descent into madness first-hand? Check out my blog at www.diceforthedicegod.com

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Top Librarian image: painted by Mathieu Fontaine (go check out his amazing work)

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Author: Scott W.
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