D&D Monster Spotlight: The Most Foul Fowl
From psychic platypuses to spider-hawk hybrids, there are some strange and terrible birds running around your favorite D&D settings.
There are some seriously weird bird monsters in D&D. Some only show up for one or two editions before the editors realize what a mistake they’ve made willing this creature into the world. Others, perhaps, unfortunately, seem here to stay. But rest assured, an adventurer who just finished celebrating Fantasy Thanksgiving will have no shortage of birds equally as evil as turkeys to eat. And turkeys, I guess. Those usually exist in fantasy settings, too.
The Abyssal Chicken
This is one of those creatures that make me want to directly ask the writer just what they were thinking. You may wonder in what way these things are chickens. I’d hazard a guess and say in the same way that people is long-pig. Apparently, the Abyssal Chicken tastes identical to a fatty chicken and is good for hunting and eating… Assuming it doesn’t hunt and eat you. They’re fast runners and use their wings to increase their speed, but are “bad fliers” and basically only stay in the air for as long as they manage to keep moving fast. Whether this is meant to invoke an image of a gliding vulture or give off more of the “falling with style” vibe isn’t terribly clear. But when the creature glide-falling at you looks like that and has the main attacks of “bite” and “claw,” I’m not sure it matters. Also, who was the first person to try Abyssal Chicken in order to say, “Mmm, tastes like chicken?” And is “tastes like chicken” a popular faerunian phrase?
The Thought Eater
While the Abyssal Chicken is a newcomer to D&D, only showing up in 5E, the Thought Eater has the exact opposite problem. It appeared in 1E through 3E and then disappeared completely. Perhaps all of the Dungeons and Dragons took a second look at this guy and said, “Y’know what? We’ve made a mistake.” The thought Eater looks like a sickly platypus and spends most of its time swimming through the ether. It can only be attacked by ethereal creatures. The Though Eater senses can, however, extend into the physical plane where it will find and feed off of your mental energy and psionic or spell energy. This causes victims to lose intelligence permanently. Actually, this one is pretty fun. If psyduck’s gaunt cousin appeared in a future 5E book I wouldn’t be mad.
The Zygraat
Also known as a spider hawk, the Zygraat is a six-legged bird of prey with tiny fangs and web-slinging abilities. This one is all of the nightmares all the time. If a 2E adventurer was unlucky enough to wander into a Zygraat’s web they wouldn’t be stuck in anything sticky. But they were trapped for one round as the Zygraat has a chance to swoop down and deliver a poisonous bite. If they managed to not walk directly into an already created web, a Zygraat can shoot webbing as an attack up to three times a day for a similar trapping effect. They build nests and have similar devour-y mating customs as spiders, feed their young like mama birds, and scuttle around on their six terrible legs. This feels like a creature I would joke about while watching Avatar. Luckily they only live in isolated forests so 2E adventurers didn’t have to worry about them too often. Will 5E eventually happen upon a Zygraat’s forest? Who knows! Hopefully not, but who knows?
What’s your favorite weird D&D bird monster? Which would you like to see some back to the game? Which would you like to see stay gone forever? Let us know in the comments!
Happy Adventuring!
