D&D: Five Spells For Brooding Darkly
Valentine’s Day is over. Now is not the time to pick up the pieces of your broken heart, but instead to try these five D&D brooding spells.
We all know that brooding is best when you’re in your feelings. And the best time to both be in your feelings and to brood is when your heart is broken.
Odds are good that, day after Valentine’s Day, you’ve woken up with a sugar hangover and an empty heart. Lean into it. Bring your A-game moping to your game with these D&D brooding spells.
Armor of Agathys
This spell covers you in a thin sheet of otherworldly ice, so your cold, dispassionate exterior will be extra cold to mask the turmoil within. Plus you’ll damage anyone who gets too close, like a good, emotionally scarred monster should.
Hunger of Hadar
Are your desires… unconventional? Do you have a forbidden hunger that you dare not give in to? Hunger of Hadar is here for you. This spell creates a 20-foot-radius sphere of blackness and bitter cold, like your heart, but it’s filled with a cacophony of soft whispers and slurping noises that can be heard up to 30 feet away.
Unknowable horror committed with distressingly erotic noises? The object backdrop for looking out from a balcony at the distant light of the stars.
Gust of Wind
Okay this one’s less about the metaphor and more the fact that, if you really wanna brood with the best of them, you are gonna need a constant stream of wind to flutter your cape and hair dramatically. Gust of Wind does exactly that.
Control Weather
He’s seen things you people wouldn’t believe…
This one’s a gimme, really, but it’s the quintessential spell for creating a rainstorm whenever you need it. Ensure the rain falls, but that the clouds part dramatically to reveal the pale moonlight when you’re deciding whether you’re in love, or in love with the idea of being in love.
Conjure Fiend
For those times when you need to show your inner demons off by turning them into outer demons.
Gloomy Adventuring!
