This Year’s Frenzy of Shark Movies – Tommy Wiseau’s ‘Big Shark’ to ‘The Meg 2’
Awesomely bad shark movie season is on its way. Here are some of the monsters coming up from the depths that you should put on your watch list.
Doll Shark – DVD April 11th
I applaud the use of puppets in this. A++
A young boy named Kirby receives a special gift from his dad, the famed shark hunter Brock Banner. However, Brock, thinking it would be a lucky charm, has hidden a tooth from a nasty shark he has just caught and killed inside the toy. Soon the doll becomes possessed by the spirit of the evil sea beast!
The Black Demon – Theaters April 28th
It’s produced by Buzzfeed studios. Why Josh Lucas signed up, I don’t know.
Oilman Paul Sturges’ idyllic family vacation turns into a nightmare when they encounter a ferocious megalodon shark that will stop at nothing to protect its territory. Stranded and under constant attack, Paul and his family must somehow find a way to get his family back to shore alive before it strikes again in this epic battle between humans and nature.
Cocaine Shark – Digital and DVD July 7
Looks like it’ll be better than the movie that inspired it.
A mafia drug lord has unleashed a new, highly addictive stimulant on the streets called HT25, derived from sharks held captive in a secret lab, and which causes monstrous side effects. After an explosion and leak at the lab, an army of mutated, bloodthirsty sharks and other creatures are set loose on the world as a small band of people tries to stop the carnage.
The Meg 2: The Trench – August 4th
There’s not a ton of information about the sequel to the 2018 surprise hit. No trailers, production stills, or interviews I can find. The first movie is based on Steve Alten’s Meg: A Novel of Deep Terror, and the sequel is based on the second book in that series: The Trench. Four years after The Meg, Jonas Taylor finds another huge pre-historic creature under the waves and has to deal with it. The cast list includes Jason Statham, Jing Wu, and Sienna Guillory. It’s directed by Ben Wheatley, and it’s listed as being in post-production.
Tommy Wiseau’s Big Shark – TBA
Three firefighters (George, Patrick & Tim) must save New Orleans from a gigantic shark. Can New Orleans survive? (Note – this might be an underwear ad, but who the heck knows with Wiseau?)
Shark Movies In the Works
Bathtub Shark Attack
A shark (that might be related to House Shark) lurks in a home’s pipes and attacks people using the bathtub. From director Madeline Deering, co-host of the Shitty Shark Show podcast.
Apex Predators 2: The Spawning
Mutant flying sharks attack a beach volleyball tournament. Part 2. Someone made AI art for it, and I can’t… I just can’t.
Close to Shore
A couple finds some artifacts from a long long ship off the coast of SoCal that turn out to be super valuable. A crime boss gets involved, and they all end up in shark-infested waters.
Invisible Shark
There’s a shark. You can’t see it. Sorry.
Fear Below
Set in Australia in the 1940s, a rag-tag team of divers attempting to salvage a sunken car full of stolen gold bullion from a river is thwarted by a highly aggressive bull shark. It’s a deadly shark… but old-timey!
Amityville Shark House
This is a Shawn C. Phillips project about a guy that buys the infamous house and ends up possessed by a shark. He bites people. I don’t know. Expect gore, nudity, the works.
No Way Up
“Characters from very different backgrounds are thrown together when the plane they’re traveling on crashes into the Pacific Ocean. When the airliner comes to rest perilously close to the edge of a ravine with the surviving passengers and crew trapped in an air pocket, a nightmare fight for survival ensues with the air supply running out and dangers creeping in from all sides.”
