D&D: WotC Reveals What Gelatinous Cubes (And Other Monsters) Taste Like
As you get ready for your very own Heroes’ Feast this year, WotC wants you to know what Gelatinous Cubes taste like.
Look we’ve all been there. You’re deep in the dungeon, fighting a Gelatinous Cube, and its jiggling menacingly at you, and the forbidden thought arises. But what does it taste like?
Doubly so if the DM has put one of the incredible Gelatinous Cube minis on the table that looks clear and dice-shaped that you could easily fit into your mouth. Like the rest of your dice. And from there it’s just a hop, skip, and a jump to choking hazards and arguing with your DM about making Mind Flayer calamari.
But now you don’t have to argue. Here’s WotC’s D&D team weighing in on what monsters taste like. Get the answers to the questions you’ve been too scared to ask.
WotC Reveals What Gelatinous Cubes, Flumphs, And More Taste Like
D&D has stat blocks for all their monsters, but taste is missing. We talk to the design team about what D&D monsters taste like.
And boy do they deliver. Because this is not only a question that you, the players, have been thinking about, it’s been on the minds of the designers as well. And they’ve put so much thought into it, as you can see from the flavor profile listed above.
Fair warning, they go pretty deep on what monsters would taste like, even when the answers aren’t something you’d welcome. Like which monster tastes like mayonnaise. There’s a nugget of knowledge I wish I could forget.
But here’s a quick breakdown. Gelatinous Cubes?
“When it starts? Plain aspic, unflavored gelatin. As it moves through the dungeon, it’s marinating, much like tofu, it’s picking up flavors—steeping. Naturally? Unflavored.”
Owlbears, on the other hand are thought of as extremely game-y. There’s a lot of muscle and gristle and, like, pellets in there.
Mind Flayers: calamari. All day long. But with a slightly more aberrant flavor profile.
Purple Worms? Obviously, spicy. Because the worm is the spice, and the spice is the worm. Whereas, Remorhazes are like giant shrimps.
What do you think your favorite monster tastes like?
