D&D’s Five Most Important Unwritten Rules
D&D is a game full of rules. Throughout the hundreds of pages of its core books, you’ll find most of them. But you won’t find these.
Dungeons & Dragons has hundreds of pages of rules. And you may or may not follow them, at your leisure, but there’s no denying that these core rules make up the game. But, as with anything that endures for more than a few years, there are plenty of unwritten rules to the game as well.
These range from memetic adages that have stuck around since the game’s founding, to best practices that were never put in place by the designers. But let’s write down some of D&D’s unwritten rules.
Don’t Split the Party
This is probably the most contentious/well-known unwritten rule in the game. Don’t split the party is a pithy quote/old-school gamer shibboleth that’s been around since the elder days of the game. When splitting up the party meant you might run into monsters on your own.
These days, plenty of adventurers split up successfully. But there’s still some wisdom to be gleaned from this unwritten rule. Splitting the party means splitting the focus. And you don’t want to do that without intention.
And one should always be wary that when on their own, they’re at more risk than with their friends.
Have a Reason to Go on the Adventure
Perhaps the most important of D&D’s unwritten rules. Your character is a fantasy adventurer. And while you might want to play a character who is a sniveling, craven piece of milquetoast, you should only do so if you can still have a reason to go on the adventure.
Edgy loners and selfish, money-driven characters abound in fantasy adventure stories. But how often are they dragged along on adventures despite themselves?
So make sure you’ve got a good reason to adventure, no matter what.
Never Make the Next Session Dependent on One Character Being There
This one’s for all you DMs out there. If you can help it, never make the starting point of the next session depend on a character being there. It doesn’t matter if they’re the most reliable, dependable character, this will all but guarantee that something will keep them from appearing.
A work meeting will come up. Family emergency. The one weekend out of the year they go to a ren fair/regional burn/other excuses for nerds to drink/party in various states of dress/undress out of doors.
It’s a reminder that nothing in life is guaranteed, but you’ve got to be prepared to continue in spite of it all. The show must go on.
‘No D&D’ is Better Than ‘Bad D&D’
This is one that comes from experience. And it’s a hard one to learn without going through it yourself. But, while D&D can be a ton of fun, that isn’t guaranteed.
And just like sex or pizza, bad D&D is often worse than not having it in the first place. There’s a reason people started talking about RPG safety tools, or have whole subforums dedicated to RPG Horror Stories. It’s not a new thing.
This rule has been true since the start of the game. And when you realize you can walk away from bad D&D, life gets infinitely better.
Pay Attention When It’s Not Your Turn
Finally, one that keeps the game moving. Combats can be long and grueling depending on how it goes. But they get even more grindy when people check out until the DM turns to them and asks what they’re doing.
Good DMs will build a bit of a recap into their narration:
The goblin, hurt from Rhogar’s attack, retreats back, aiming a short bow at Gromble.
But things can change from turn to turn. And the action you might take might be different when the target you thought would be alive got taken out by a lucky crit. When you’re engaged and paying attention, you might spot opportunities to help a party member out, or take out an exposed enemy.
Paying attention can be hard, for sure. But even just a momentary check-in right before your action can make a big difference.
What are your unwritten rules to live by?
