D&D: Five Ways to Get High AF in the Forgotten Realms
It’s 4/20 and you know what that means. Two more days ’til Earth day, so you may as well get high in D&D. Here’s how.
You could also get high and play D&D, we don’t judge. But I’ve been told I’m not allowed to comment on what BoLS’s official stance is on legalization. Nevertheless, today is one of the two funny meme numbers days. And that means it’s time to talk about all the ways you can get faded in Faerun.
And if you think that it’s just older art that’s all about that pipeweed, you’ve got another thing coming. The books are full of all sorts of concoctions that will elevate your consciousness and expand your mind. Or, y’know, just give you a good afternoon where you can really, really get into Guy Fieri’s grocery games.
I’m not saying that the Forgotten Realms is a stoner’s paradise. But the Forgotten Realms were created by someone named Ed Greenwood. So if you’re looking to roll a 20 on 4/20, here’s five ways to get high AF in Faerun.
Ziran
Ziran is a drug from the Underdark. Originally introduced in Lords of Darkness, Ziran also called Bloodfast, is a great way to kick things off. Despite the name, there’s nothing bloody about it. Ziran makes you fluid. It helps you move gracefully, increasing your Dexterity for 1d3 hours. But it also gives users a floating sense of detachment. Like an out-of-body experience, with users reporting ‘watching themselves from a distance.’
It’ll take the edge off of anything.
Panaeolo
First of all Panaeolo is what narcs call Netheril Herb. First discovered in the empire of Netheril, Netheril Herb is a magic-user’s drug of choice. It’s hard to come by because it vanished from the Realms until the City of Shade reappeared. And that name makes way more sense now that I think about it.
Netheril Herb “attunes you to the weave”, which means you feel maaaagical. To the point that your spell saving throw DCs increase by 2. Though you do take Charisma Damage because you keep talking about how your hands can touch anything but themselves.
Mordayn Vapor
Also called Dreammist, this is potent concoction of rare herbs that is generally taken by inhaling the vapors of tea, which is about on par with what you’d expect from the Forgotten Realms. Inhaling the Dreammist induces a dreamlike state wherein users see “visions of incredible beauty” that enthrall them, distracting them 50% of the time.
Vornduir
Introduced in Ed Greenwood Presents Elminster’s Forgotten Realms, Vornduir is created from a mixture of “essences” of certain herbs and select animals, which is distressing – but when inhaled users can expect to experience a variety of effects including feeling warm, content, alert, and resistant to cold. They might also experience a veritable buffet of side-effects from nothing at all, to itching, or reversing pain and pleasure stimuli (and if that feels a little BDSM-y, well, there’s a whole other article about Faerun’s horny history).
Cheeeese
Or more properly known as Luiren spring cheese, cheeeese is as D&D a drug as it possibly gets, which is to say it’s what someone’s idea of a drug for hobbits would be. It only effects halflings, it’s a special cheese that was introduced in a supplement called Aurora’s Whole Realms Catalogue, and it is basically a cheese that gets only halflings drunk, and it’s every bit as awful as you’d expect.
1992 was a heck of a year, is all I can say.
Happy Adventuring
